And Then There Was Us

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Relationships are the zest of life.  Whether your “us” is a friendship or romantic relationship or both, connections with others bring different dimensions and perspectives to your world. Some are more significant than others, but they all have one thing in common: one second that person was not in your life, and then the next second they were, and that is the moment your life in some way changed forever.

Photo by Studio Eiler @studioeiler

How often do you think about the first moment you met a friend or significant other? I must admit that sometimes I am guilty of focusing more on why someone has left my life or why a relationship isn’t as strong as it used to be instead of thinking back to what our initial encounter meant for my life. In fact, sometimes I dwell so much on why a relationship has faded that I neglect giving deserved thought to the people who are actually still in my life.

When I challenge myself to think way back to the first moments of meeting someone and our early memories together, I get chills!  It’s truly amazing that we have no idea what that first conversation with someone could lead to, and the years of friendship that could potentially develop over time. Friendships and romantic relationships both have those initial awkward moments of the “figuring each other out” types of questions. It is hard for me to even picture these moments with certain people in my life seeing where our friendships are now, but I know that they all started somewhere!

The Meaning of “Us”

I want to go back to the title of this post and the simple idea behind it: one second someone is not a part your life and the next second they are, and everything has changed. When you think of the phrase, “and then there was us,” who comes to mind?  Is it a friend? Is it your husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend?  Maybe a family member you became close with over time?

I think of the moment I first met my husband in Florida when I was on vacation.  I think of the first trip up north I took with my group of friends from high school.   I think of meeting my best girlfriends from college and how it’s like no time has passed when we get together. I think of the friends I met at my first job who supported me and lifted me up through those years, and continue to do so to this day.  I think of the friends I have made since my life-changing move to Chicago. I think of my childhood friend from Kindergarten who understands every part of me, sometimes even better than I understand myself.

This is just to name a few.

All of these relationships continue to add to my life in so many ways, and when I think back to how we started, I can’t even imagine my life before we were “us.” When I think back to these moments of how we first met, there are 3 feelings that overcome me.

1. Gratitude

Reflecting back to the time I have met the people in my life brings an overwhelming sense of gratitude to my soul.  I love thinking back to the moment we introduced ourselves, totally unknowing of all of the support, the laughter, and the memories we would contribute to each other’s lives. Thoughts from the past make me appreciate the time, energy, and effort it has taken for us to get to this present place in our relationship — a place of complete trust, openness, and ease. We have grown roots that are deep and meaningful and a foundation that is indestructible, and for these I am thankful!

2. Nostalgia

Some of my friendships are more recent while others are more than 10 years old. No matter when these relationships originated, they all have history. I can’t help but smile when I think back to these initial experiences we had together when life was different and we were all a little younger.  Experiencing your past life with others naturally makes you feel closer. By reminiscing and reliving experiences through conversation and laughter, you are able to reflect on how you have both grown and changed, as well as what has remained the same in your relationship.  The nostalgia from the memories of your first experiences together sparks a connection that can bring an excitement for new memories that are in the making!

3. Comfort

I find comfort in knowing that Chuck and my friendships truly know the real me, and have from the very beginning. On both sides we have taken time to understand each other’s fears, our dreams, our likes and our dislikes.  We have traveled together along the peaks and valleys of our lives. My friends are aware of the ways in which I am growing in my mind and soul. They have loved me through all of my mistakes and life lessons, offering nothing but encouragement.  There may have been disagreements and maybe even some episodes of silence, but there has always been comfort in knowing that the bond we have worked to create from the very beginning can never be broken. This kind of bond takes time, as well as energy and effort from both sides.  My heart is full as I look back at the experiences and conversations that have strengthened that bond in each of my relationships.

What if we went into every new encounter with the thought that our lives are in some way changing because of meeting this person?

I am ALL KINDS of emotional thinking back to the beginnings of some of the amazing friendships and relationships that I have in my life.

Take a moment to think back to meeting someone who is now such a significant part of your life that you are unable to even recall what life was like before the day you met. Share your memory of this moment with them, and see if they are able to remember anything more about this memory!  Appreciate how far your relationship has come from where it started — that initial “hello” that caused both of your lives to change forever.

Wishing you zest and light,
Stephanie =)

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28 thoughts on “And Then There Was Us

  1. Stephanie,
    Another thought provoking piece!!!
    Whenever I receive a notification that you have written again, I grab a cup of coffee and go to my favorite part of my couch and read your blog!!
    Thank you!!!


    1. Thank you for your support, Judy! Whenever I see a comment come through from you my heart smiles =) It makes me so happy that you enjoy the blog. Thank you so much!!

  2. Great post Stephanie! A really good exercise to stop & reflect on how each person in our lives, past & present have shaped us!


    1. Thank you, Jaclyn! Yes, I believe we have so many people in our past and present who have helped shape us; it’s pretty amazing, isn’t it?? Thank you so much for reading!!

  3. I’ve never really thought about this, but it’s so cool to take a moment and try to remember where and when all your relationship started. I got chills just like you! You never really know where each moment in time and each meeting will take you.

    1. Yes, isn’t it so fun to think back to the first moment you met someone!? While I can’t think back to the exact moment I met you or the rest of our group, I have all of these flashes of memories from when we all first started hanging out together, and it definitely gives me chills. I’m so thankful that over 10 years later here we are, at different stages of our lives, but still so connected! Thanks so much for reading, Brooke!! xoxo

  4. As always – so amazing! It was a bit emotional for me to read this since Jared and I just move to a a new city. At the same time it helped me 🙂 I’m excited to form new relationships in Dallas. Thanks for always brightening my day :)!

    1. Thank you, Milda!! I hope your move to beautiful Dallas went smoothly! I felt the same way when I moved to Chicago. It is scary moving to a new city where you don’t know anyone and you haven’t formed those strong bonds yet, but they WILL happen! Thank you for being such a light and for your ongoing support with my blog! So grateful for the photo/comment/like that began our friendship!=)

  5. Lovey💕
    Your words say so much more when it comes to “ us”.
    I laugh at a certain things that triggers those great feelings/ struggles, and memories we’ve had. Sometimes it’s a song that brings me right back In your kitchen and mine!! Dance party Friday’s!! Without being able to see you everyday. All of those great triggers let’s me know that you are always with me, maybe not physicallyhowever the mental image is strong enough to get me through the difficult times; and to feel grateful of all the good times.
    Thank you for reminding all of us how important friends, partners, and relationships are.

    1. These memories all made me smile, Michele!! We will always have our dance parties in the kitchen, and wine nights! We have been through a lot together, and so much of it has shaped who I am, and it has made our friendship grow and grow. I can’t imagine my life before you came dancing into it, and am so thankful for all of the memories in my life that you and I share! Cheers to MANY more!! I love you!!

  6. Wow, it’s really nice to reflect on these things, like you said too often we focus on the ending rather than how it all started! I have some pretty amazing people in my life and it’s true that one day they were there and it just was ment to be like I couldn’t remember what life was like before them. Some have moved on both positively to new things in their lives and negatively from my life but all have a place in creating the life I live today!

    1. Thanks for reading, Ashley! Yes, too often (especially lately) I have focused on how a relationship has faded away or ended. It’s much more difficult to go back to the beginning to how it started, but very enlightening and bright if you can get your mind to travel back that far! Practicing this really helps me see the positive in all of my relationships! Thanks for visiting Citrus & Sun, and this thoughtful comment!

  7. I take for granted a lot of the relationships in my life. This is a great reminder to sit and reflect with gratitude all of these essential people in our lives. Thank you for the great post!

    1. I have found myself in this same place, Chelsea. Having gratitude definitely has helped me get past some of these thoughts, too. Thank you so much for reading!!

  8. This was a very touching and thoughtful post about relationships and first meetings. I don’t actually remember a lot of the details of when I first met the significant people in my life — wish there was some sort of technology that could have recorded first moments so that you could look back at them years in the future.

    1. Wouldn’t this be interesting?? I remember a movie that I once say with Robbin Williams that involved some sort of technology like this that allowed people to see all of their past memories. It was very cool in some ways, a little scary in others, but it’s a neat thought and idea! Thanks so much for reading and for visiting Citrus & Sun!

  9. Like everyone else has said… “another great post!” I loved thinking about the ways I met so many people… I wish I remembered our first initial conversations though! But I am very similar to you in that sometimes I let myself get weighed down by the frustrations of friendships evolving or the loss of a friendship, and I many times forget to focus or be thankful for the other amazing relationships I have. It’s good to sit and revisit these things… it will hopefully make us better friends and allow us to be so much more thankful for those in our lives!

    1. Thank you, Erin!! I know, I almost find that I want to start writing down when I meet someone new or make a friend just so I can remember that first conversation or meeting, and then see where the friendship goes! It would be interesting, wouldn’t it?? I love what you said about how practicing this can allow us to be more thankful for those in our lives. I truly believe in this and have already found that it has helped me appreciate those in my life so much more. As always, thank you for such a thoughtful comment! Your support means to the world to me!

    1. Aww this is so great, Vidya, I am so happy that this post brought back some memories! It’s amazing what we can find when we take time to travel back and reflect. Thank you for reading!

  10. I loved this post! relationships are so important in life, every time we met someone new she or he can completely change the way we are, can give us new perspectives and inspire us to do new things! very important to realize how was our life without these persons as you said! 😀

    1. I agree 100%, Pilar! I love what you said about inspiring us to do new things. I have so many people in my life who have taught me something new or inspired me to try something that I never would have done if it was not for them! Thank you for this thoughtful comment!

  11. I was always taught that your family and friends are what make life worth living. I grew up pretty poor, but there was never a time when I didn’t have friends and family around so I was always happy.

    1. YES, I truly believe that friends and family are the most essential things we have in our lives! These relationships are so important, no matter what your life situation may be! Thanks for reading, Jeff!

  12. 💜😘💜Love,💜Hugs😘✝️Believe✝️😘💜
    Yes, to ponder where all of the people that have crossed our paths in life, is a really interesting way to figure out why they are in or out of our lives!
    More great words you have shared with your devoted ‘fans’, friends and acquaintances.
    💜😘Take Good Care and Please Be Safe!😘💜
    💜😘✝️Know You Are Loved✝️😘💜

    1. Thank you, Julia! It is definitely interesting and beautiful to reflect on all of these moments!! So happy to have you in my life!

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